You think by now you’re on the top of your game. If you’re paying attention, though, you should get better in bed with every single partner you have. In short, you should be a lifelong learner. That’s a true Casanova at work. If you think you’ve reached your peak when it comes to sexual prowess, think again. Here are the top 10 mistakes men make in bed and how to avoid them.
I’ve been with too many men who are almost creepy quiet while we’re having sex. We women aren’t all about looks when it comes to sex. We want all of our senses tingling, including our hearing. We also wanna feel like we’re driving you crazy. And if you’re able to hold in moans of pleasure, we think we’re not doing a good enough job. You don’t have to exaggerate, but let us know you’re feeling good. Moan away. Dirty talk is welcome, too.
You skip through foreplay.
Sometimes, just like you, we just wanna fuck. Other times, we want you to work up to it real slow. Foreplay is almost as important as the actual sexual act when it comes to women. This is because most of us need a ton of clitoral stimulation to orgasm, and it’s been proven that the more foreplay you have, the more exciting orgasm you’ll have. Not to mention, teasing us by working up to sex as slow as you possibly can drives us fucking crazy.
You don’t ask what we want.
There are few things sexier than men who actually ask what we want and then give it to us. Don’t be afraid to have an in-depth conversation about turn-ons and turn-offs. God, communicative men get us going.
You do your ABCs.
My first boyfriend told me his friends gave him the advice to “do his ABCs” while having oral sex. In other words, focus on the clit and lash your tongue in the shape of every letter of the alphabet. Rinse, repeat. This is the worst advice I’ve ever heard. Way too many men skip out on oral sex or just work through their ABCs, tongue-flicking the clitoris. Newsflash: this isn’t nearly enough. Think about what you want when you get head. There’s slow and sensual to fast and hard. There’s sucking. There’s teasing. We want all of this. We also want you to get handsy. Go for digital penetration, going from one finger, to two, to three… Stroke our G-spot. Etc.
You expect her to get an orgasm from intercourse alone.
Some girls can do it. A lot can’t. If she can’t, encourage her to finger herself while you go at it – tell her it’s sexy. And of course, finger her yourself. Vibrators do the trick, too.
You’re too rough or too gentle.
Jackhammer sex can be super hot. It feels like you’re so into it you’re going as fast as you fucking can. Slow and sensual can be great, too, especially when it’s so slow it drives us crazy and teases us. Switching back and forth between the two is even better. Sticking to just one? Boring.
You pull out all your tricks the first time.
This is hard when you’re especially macho or you’re trying insanely hard to keep her, but if you’re sex savvy, you’ll save some tricks up your sleeve and surprise us later on. Chicks love surprises.