Let’s face it, sex isn’t always fun. Despite our lofty sexual fantasies and detailed plans, things won’t always turn out as planned. Our bodies may even get in the way, making us do things we otherwise refuse to do during sex such as farting or sneezing in our partner’s face.
At times, those erogenous zones can have an unpleasant smell, especially after a hard day’s work. Even before having the chance to clean ourselves, sexy time can be so irresistible that nothing matters except those excited hormones wanting to explode.
Yes, sex can be fun, satisfying, and pleasant. But it can also be gross, annoying or a bit awkward. We really don’t know how sex will turn out, particularly when a new partner pops up.
If your sex life hasn’t been this gross, wait till you see it in the face. Or, if you’ve been there, welcome to the club. Below are some of the things that can make your bedroom experience the worst you’ve ever done, if not the worst nightmare that can give you goosebumps every time the memory creeps in.
1. Saying the wrong name
Most people who are into one-night stands or in uncommitted relationships are guilty of calling out the wrong name. Remembering a random partner’s name may not be that important, but please avoid giving them the wrong name during sex. It’s way too off-putting.
2. Pushing too hard
Harder thrusts bring much pleasure but don’t overdo it to cause tears in her vagina. Also, getting too frisky can be a dangerous move for your penis, especially when you’re in an awkward position. This is a common cause of penis injuries. If you don’t want to end your kinky time in the ER, you might as well take it slow and easy.
3. Finishing too soon
Sex therapist Stephen Snyder suggests that sex should be focused on the journey and not on the end game. Cumming too soon can create tension in the relationship since your partner hasn’t come to the peak yet. Before exploding your load, make sure your partner is about to orgasm. Or else, she might get frustrated and dump you the way you disregard her sexual pleasure.
4. Forgetting to kiss
Kiss stimulates connection and intimacy. If you exclude it in your routine due to positioning, you miss an otherwise romantic encounter with your partner. Your partner may not feel loved or romantically desired when she doesn’t receive a kiss from you during foreplay. She might end up thinking you’re only after her body and not her whole being.
5. Checking the phone at mid-sex
Seriously? Checking your phone when you receive a text or call while on a date can be forgivable but during sex, no way. When you do that, you only give your partner the message that you’re not one hundred percent present with her. Your thoughts are somewhere else. It could also mean you’re expecting a message from someone who is more important than her or what you’re doing under the sheets.
6. Not giving enough time for foreplay
Women take time to warm up. They appreciate it much when you understand their needs and help them go through it slowly and deliberately, with excitement and anticipation. Rushing can be a total bummer. If you won’t give this consideration, don’t wonder why she won’t show up on your next date.
7. Checking the time
You’re in a hurry, aren’t you? Or, is that your subtle way of saying you’re bored? Sex can be less enjoyable with a less stimulating partner. But the more you show you’re bored, the more she feels awful about herself or her performance. You either have to get creative to spice things up a bit or end up the session to reduce the agony. The decision can be tough but it’s the only way to keep things moving.
8. Using feathers
Feathers can give her the chills and the pleasure but be mindful that the tiny bits of the thing won’t enter her vagina. It may cause an infection down there, which you don’t want to regret later.
9. Having sex in different bodies of water
Sex in the pool, the sea or the lake seems exciting, right? But don’t be fooled. While all these bodies of water are natural and free of chlorine, they can serve as good hosts to microbes and bacteria that can pose a serious health risk to the vagina. These harmful bacteria can be forced into the vagina during underwater sex. To be safe, steer clear from these areas.
10. Sneezing in your partner’s face
A sneeze can be felt when it’s coming. Look to the side, away from your partner’s face when you’re about to sneeze or cough. While it’s a bit awkward, it’s forgivable than sneezing in their faces.
11. Comparing your new partner with your ex’s technique
Hearing “my ex does it this way” can be upsetting right? Avoid saying the same thing to your partner during sex. No matter how mind blowing your ex’s performance had been, leave her in the past where she rightfully belongs. No person is the same, especially when the other has less experience. Instead of comparing, put your focus into teaching your new partner the techniques that can make you wild.
12. Getting upset with criticisms
Good sex takes lots of time, effort, and experience. The more you do it, the better you get at it. To improve sexual experience, feedback is necessary. If either of you or your partner takes criticisms too seriously, it could lead to disappointments, frustrations or performance anxiety, which can be quite unpleasant and can create flaws in your future sexual encounter. Feeling insulted about feedback shows immaturity.
13. Bringing up politics
Sure, silent sex can feel creepy. Your partner needs to hear your voice from time to time. But please don’t bring up the trending news while she’s about to orgasm. She doesn’t give a damn as to how the lives of other people turn out. All she wants is for you to give her the most pleasurable sex there is. Save your intelligent opinion for later.